Labor education is a kind of obligatory course for every freshman. Up to now, we have already practiced it for about two semesters. However, passing through these two semesters, I have many thoughts to talk about as follow.
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At the beginning of doing the labor education in the first semester, I was really curious about why we had to do this in the college. In addition, my three groups were all in the morning. Thus, it was really painful that I had to get up early in the morning. At first, I really hated and felt a little irritated. I also couldn’t accept the fact that my cleaning scope was that big and I was the only cleaner. However, it seemed really terrible for me. After for a while, I changed my attitude and adapted myself to it. I gradually found that it was not that bad. The group leader is kind to us, and they would greet you with a big smile. It would let me have a good mood in the morning and give me a motive to go there to clean. Now, I am accustomed to the labor education. I think I can learn many things and also makes many friends from it.
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Perhaps, that the school lets us do the labor education is truly meaningful. They want us to learn to do everything on our own accord and learn more from doing. Maybe it will help us a lot in the future.
Good writing piece, Connie.
回覆刪除The article structure is clear and points are well developed.
Please correct the following mistakes though:
1.Labor education is a kind of obligatory course for every freshmen.
是freshman
2. Up to now, we have already enforced for about two semesters.
第一這裏不用enforce這個字，enforce不這樣用，仔細看它的用法http://tw.dictionary.yahoo.com/search?ei=UTF-8&p=enforce
第二、用we have already practiced it for ...
3.
However, passing through these two semesters, I have many expressions to talk about as follow.
第一不錯喔 你都有用一些變化的文法句型
第二expressions不這樣用，改thoughts
4. At the beginning of doing the labor education in the first semester, I was really curious about why we had to do this in the college.
Good!
5. In addition, my three groups all in the morning.
這一句少了動詞
6. At first, I really hated and felt a little irritated at then.
把at then拿掉
7. I also couldn’t accept that my cleaning scope was that big and all did by me.
第一用accept the fact that...
第二 and I was the only cleaner.
8. It seemed really terrible for me. After for a while, I changed my attitude and adapted this habit.
找個地方加個however
改 and adapted myself to it
9. It would let me have a good mood in the morning and give me a motive power to go there to clean.
motive就OK 不用掛power
10. Now, I am accustomed to the labor education. I think I can learn many things and also makes many friends from it.
Very good.
11. Perhaps, the school let us do the labor education; it truly has its meaning.
這兩句要改成: Perhaps THAT the school letS us do the labor education IS truly meaningful.
12. They want us to learn to do everything of our own accord and learn more from doing.
of our own accord改 on our own accord
13 Maybe it will help us a lot in the future.
(Well...maybe...=))
恩 改得不錯 ;)
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